Social Media

(from 2015)

Nowadays, it seems the natural thing for people to be linked to millions of other people as internet “friends”. And if you fall out, to dramatically “un-friend” them with a simple click. “Unfriend” - now isn’t that a lovely word for our modern age! To a UK pedant it has a classic American permutation of prefix and noun about it.  I have generally resisted the temptation to join in the fun. As it happens, I personally know of a couple of marriages that were already tottering being given that final kiss of doom by someone meeting someone else whose pigtails they once pulled in junior school and thinking that if only... And of course it has still ended in tears for everybody concerned.

However, many years ago I did succumb to one of the first of these social media sites, which was Friends Reunited.

All I did was look up my old schools – especially my infants and junior school. (That’s ages 5-11 in the UK). I posted that this elderly podiatrist was once a pupil at F.E. and immediately forgot about it. But out of the blue winged a message from someone who I had not seen or heard of since she flounced off down the road when I was seven because I’d upset her. (That was probably the start of my long career of upsetting people). It comes from having a slightly uncommon name I guess – probably sort of stuck in her memory like gum on a shoe for decades thereafter. It was interesting to hear what had happened to mutual acquaintances who had been in the same class at junior school. I was put in touch for just one-email-each-way with a bubbly young person in my class who had later hit rock bottom, and then spent several decades clambering out of the morass. I guess there is nothing like a parental feud at a child’s crucial age to potentially trash their development. I subsequently discovered an autograph book which once belonged to my mother, which I had used on the last day at that school. It had been languishing in my loft for decades. All the names were there, with messages from all the other 11 year olds. One day I might resurrect my contact with Friends Reunited and post all those scans. Or maybe I’d better just let sleeping dogs lie...

I have firmly resisted Facebook. Well, actually, technically I am a member, but that was an accident with a professional colleague, and subsequently it has only been used to track down people, wearing my Sam Spade hat. It’s quite amazing what some people post, without thinking of the consequences. (That is not a reference to this blog owner by the way.) However, Mrs O has recently joined Facebook because our daughter has her own pages for work, and now she gets posts about dogs and languages and stuff. It is quite entertaining, but I think the pixie blog (plus a few other places I’ll keep quiet about here) are quite enough excitement for this elderly gentleman for the moment.

But then I made a BIG mistake with Linkedin. This is supposed to be for professionals, and several people in my profession sent me emails – or at least some automated response system pretended that they had. So last week I decided to live dangerously and click where it suggested for just one person. I repeat – for just one person. Aaaagh – the folly of not really knowing what you are doing. Immediately an email was sent – purportedly from me – to about 500 contacts – all of whom I had shared some vague email communication with since the internet was invented.

I have glumly watched the consequences. Fortunately a good number have thought – who on earth was that? – or thought – I know exactly who on earth that is – and no way do I want to be in touch again. That has whittled it down somewhat. But emails were sent to University lecturers with whom I did battle over sterilisation techniques years ago (I had better clarify that means sterilisation of podiatry instruments), and long-lost second cousins twice removed who I found and willingly lost again when doing family history, plus scores of people who I see every week and know exactly what they are up to, and don’t need my inbox clogged up with the details again thank you very much.

The information super highway. Huh. Very much overrated sometimes.